Another day of waiting with a mixture of activity and thoughts filled today as it does most days lately.
How’s Lanie?
Lanie loves to clean and keep things tidy. Scott LOVES that ( and so do I). She makes the beds, wipes down tables, picks up things on the floor and makes sure all doors remain closed to look tidy. Thats is all great except when ahe locks the bedroom door and then closes it! Thankfully she was nit inside the bedroom, but it took a while before we could get the door unlocked.
The Honeymoon phases is wearing off now. We still get plenty of smiles, laughs, dances, hugs and kisses. However, we have experienced the pouty face, digging her heels in and saying “no” when asked to do something as well as a full blown temper tantrum when attempting to go to sleep. Night time is becoming harder and harder. She lies awake clinging to me not willoing to close her eyes. It’s ugly. She doesn’t want Scott at all. If he comes in to be with her until she goes to sleep, the crying or last night the temper tantrums begin. Eventually she will turn over and go to sleep though with him. I’m considering making my bedtime 8:30 with her for a while. 🙁 It may take hours of laying with her before she’ll go down, but that may be in our future.
She is VERY attached to me which is good, but she wants me with her all of the time. She loves and plays with Scott and Alli too, but she wants me there as well. I knew this first 6 months would be difficult. I knew it would take a lot of me to affirm to her that we love her, care for her and aren’t going to leave. I knew she would throw temper tantrums, test the boundaries etc. I have many kids do that with me in the past. However, hen the reality of it begins and I cant’ speak fluent Spanish to talk with her, it is hard.
Her speech delay is also challenging. The native Spanish speakers have a very hard time understanding her. Thus you can image how difficult it is for Scott and I. We can understand basic words if we say them and she nods that that is what she is saying. However, phrased and full sentences are very difficult. We hope to begin teaching her English tomorrow. At least then we’ll know how she is attempting to pronounce a word. In many ways, she is like a sweet, independent at times toddler with limited vocabulary and constant need for reassurance. She wants desperately to please us. She loves our high fives when she’s done something well.
She truly is still a delight full of joy. Her foster mom prepared her well. She has done a wonderful job. However, all adopted children have trauma in their past and the transition to a new world and family is difficult.
How’s Alli?
Alli has done a remarkable job being a big sister. She said sometimes it’s lots of fun and sometimes it’s annoying (honest!). They dance together, read together, play baloon soccer together and much more. She has been wonderful. Like all of us, she is missing our home, her room, friends and more. She’s wanting more of our undivided attention though. It’s all very fun, great and hard all at the same time. She’s looking forward to more one on one time with mommy and daddy. Today she and Scott are going out for the morning. Tomorrow morning she and I will go to the shopping mall together. I CAN’T WAIT!
Today (or really yesterday)
We discovered a beautiful park and heated swimming pool with our other adoption friends today. Lanie is very cautious about trying new things. She has swam before as we have a picture of her in a swimming pool. However, she was extremely timid about it today. She spent the first hour next to me on the side and then she gradually made her way to the side of the pool and splashed with Scott and the kids for a while. She never made it in the pool fully.
Looking Ahead:
Tomorrow at 2 is our integration meeting. Hopefully it will go well and our paperwork can be submitted to the courts. A computer will choose which judlge we get. We hear some work much quicker than others. Please pray for a quick one!
If we are released from our integration time period, we will go to a coffee farm this weekend with our other adoption family. We should learn how the coffee is made. We are told we will have our own jucuzzi and pool next to our private villa?
Due to our extended time in country, we may fly to Cartegena on the coast for a while if we can find cheep tickets there. It looks very nice there and wouldn’t be a change of scenery. We’ll see????
Random thoughts:
Here is a peak insidse our brains (could be scary):
- We love Lanie. She brings spunk and fun to our family.
- This place is beautiful with the mountains. We are able to slow down.
- I need something to accomplish that is tangible. Cleaning toilets might even be fun!
- This challenges are expected.
- The challenges are hard. I don’t like it.
- I don’t want to die to my selfishness, miss out on reading to Alli in the evenings and sleep with Lanie all night.
- I want Lanie to feel safe and loved – I will do whatever is needed.
- God has provided so much – apartment, other adopting family, brought her to us despite the mudslide and so much more – Thank you Lord
Those are just a few of the conflicting and random thoughts that go through our little heads often.
Until next time,